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Jade's Story
I first started living with my
husband in 1983. He had been married first for 18 months and second for 9
years. He had three daughters by the second marriage. I had been married
first in 1966 which lasted for 16 years and had 3 sons of roughly the same
age.
From the beginning his ex-wife claimed I had "stolen" her husband despite
the fact it was a very unhappy marriage and he was the one to make a move.
She was also a Catholic and maintained he was hers for ever. All this was
relayed to the girls and for years I had a very difficult time.
I stuck it out and after five years she could no longer prevent the
divorce and we married in 1987. The financial settlement was crippling,
she got the house, maintenance for the three children, school fees and a
third of our net income for herself.........read
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Niamh's Story
I met my partner when I was 14 and he
was 20. He was my youth club leader! We loved each other at a distance,
and although he knew how I felt, he never let on how he felt (would have
caused too much damage with me being underage etc).
I moved away and we lost touch until 2003, when I contacted him through
friends reunited. We became friends - both he and I, and his then wife and
I.
We became closer after she gave him my mobile phone number, and she
encouraged us to meet up - until the night before, when she went
completely off her head!
We met up, and nothing happened apart from her screaming down the phone at
both of us and her asking if I'd slept with him yet!.........read
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Isabel's Story
I first met my partner about nine
years ago. He was happily with his girlfriend of the time, and they used
to come down and visit his brother (a very good friend of mine) while we
were at college. He and I were friendly, though I never really clicked
with her, I found her a little odd and a bit cold.
Some years later, they had a child, a little girl who's now five. A short
while after she was born they got married. They had moved to a foreign
country and financially it made more sense than simply living together.
To cut a long story short, she had an affair a short while before they
married, then continued it afterwards. After a few weeks he sensed
something was wrong, she confessed, and he decided to leave her.
About a year after he had left, I bumped into him when we were out one
night...........read
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Beth's Story
I met my husband almost 13 years ago.
He was separated with two girls aged 6 and 8. His wife had an affair and
this was the main cause of the split. I had recently come out of a bad
relationship, and was living with a friend as my property had been rented
out. I had no children and had never been married.
When we first met, he was living with his friend who had kindly given him
a roof over his head. His ex had him evicted from the marital home three
days before Christmas, using false accusations of violence to secure an
injunction. I never doubted he was not violent and did not believe her
endless tales of beatings and threats. My now husband has never shown any
signs of being violent, it must have been terrible for him to be handed an
eviction notice from his own home............read
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Daisy's Story
From the stories I have read so far,
my situation would seem to be rather unusual (and I'd love to hear from
anyone else in The BSWC with similar experiences).
I am now 53 and I married my husband 2 and a half years ago. He is 62 and
has 2 children by each of his previous wives. Since I met him seven years
ago, I have got on well with his first wife's children who are grown up
and leading their own lives. His younger two were living with their mother
and visited us regularly. I didn't really enjoy their visits, although I
put a smiling face on and accepted that it was necessary for them to have
contact with their father.
I was always hugely relieved when they went home to their Mum and I could
clean up their mess and get back to normal..............read
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Ruby's Story
I met my partner at work, he was a
buyer and I was an administrator although we worked 100 miles apart we
were in touch over emails regularly and over time became close.
He was married to his wife of 19 years with two teenage children and I
knew this and was quite happy just to have him as a friend. I had a 2 year
old from a previous relationship. And there is a twelve year age gap.
After some time he was posted to my contract and asked if he could stay
with me to save on his lodging costs. I was horrified...oh no a man
messing up my house!! But I agreed as I didn't know how to say no and he
came to stay mid-week.
Nothing happened, we were friends and I loved being single and
independent.
Slowly I realised I loved him and he loved me. I am not a marriage
breaker..............read
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Phoebe's Story
Hi, I'm 53 with grown up children and
three grandchildren, who I don't see a lot of as my daughter their Mother
moved away when she had her first child. Unfortunately, when she was
growing up I had two failed marriages and became a widow and also I was a
single parent very poor I might add, as my previous husband who had passed
away, and whose business I had invested all my savings in from my first
marriage, (having sets aside money first for my children) left me
absolutely penniless and bankrupt 3-times over. He was also very violent
and I had run away several times, last time ending up in a refuge with my
kids.
I had by this time exhausted the sympathies of my own family and they were
slight weary of the SAGA, as myself and children were labelled! (no jokes
about the poverty please, it was genuine, some ex-wives don't know they're
living today as we well know)..............read
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Mia's Story
I have been with my partner for 18
months now. He has a six year old little boy who lives with us for half of
the week. He wasn't married to his ex - but they had a long stormy
relationship.
They were together 14 years in total. In that time she managed to get
married to someone else, buy a house behind his back, sleep with someone
every time she changed jobs, the list goes on and on.
I don't think the relationship was particularly happy - however she was
his first love and I can understand that is very difficult to let go of.
Once they had a child - his sense of duty and responsibility kept him
where he was. She doted on the child and wanted more. However her idea of
family life was the three of them confined within the walls of the house.
She controlled the relationship between father and son, what they did,
where they went etc. So - he didn't want any more...............read
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Amber's Story
My ex husband and I separated over
three years ago. He has has since become engaged and we all get on well,
with our children (15 and 17) going to stay with them every other week (as
we live close by they stay for the whole week with no disturbance of
school etc).
I met my man nearly three years ago. He is a divorced (five years) father
of two girls (9 and 14). At first everything seemed ok. We all got on.
Then he (officially) moved in and I suffered an ectopic pregnancy. Since
then the ex wife has become a complete horror!
When they first separated and divorced she was a problem - not letting him
see the kids, etc...............read
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Poppy's Story
When I met my husband in 2000, he was
single and had been for over two years. He has two children and I was also
single with two children. We met each others kids and they all got on
great. They're all within one year in age apart.
The trouble with his ex started when we moved in together. I couldn't take
them out without getting a solicitors letter, I wasn't allowed to
discipline them with out a letter, (you get the idea). When we got married
abroad in 2005, she wouldn't let the kids come even though we were paying
for everything ,and we wanted them as bridesmaids. They begged her to come
and she said no, and now they're missing from our wedding photos
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Evie's Story
I have been dating this guy now for
just over seven months. We both had split from our partners only just two
months before and both have children with our ex- partners. I have one
child who lives with me and he has three children who live with him and
this is where my problem starts.
His ex-partner suffered from bipolar depression and is now under control
through tablets but due to this the children live with my partner as she
was too unfit to have them. She is now well and is also dating someone
else.
My problem is she comes around to my new partner's house (which is also
still hers as her name is still on the deeds but she now lives in her own
place with her new guy), every single day to see the kids
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Keira's Story
I am divorced with two grown up
children. I consider myself to have no 'baggage' as such as I was married
for 20 years and was happy for most of that time. I am now with a man who
has been married twice before. The ending of his second marriage left him
quite broken emotionally.
We got engaged after a year and planned to marry this summer but it
appeared he got 'cold feet' and he cancelled it some months ago. He says
it has just been postponed until he is ready but I don't think I would
consider planning another wedding. We had everything virtually ready so it
was a great shock. I had also planned to sell my property
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Bethany's Story
My husband left his first wife nearly
six and a half years ago now. We had been friends for about a year before
started seeing each other and there was definitely a mutual attraction
there. I had been married before (with no children) but was single at the
time.
He left at Christmas which is not really a good time but he did. He left
her with their 10 year old son. He left because she could not stop
drinking. She binged every night and became abusive then the final straw
was when a large group of us went out for a friend's birthday. She started
flirting and kissing a young lad in our group in front of all of us. My
husband was obviously embarrassed and humiliated...............read
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Jodie's Story
Wow, where do I begin?
I married a widower one year after his first wife's death and he has two
girls. I moved into his home with my two girls. His home was on his
deceased wife's father's property and no one accepted me and my children
on her side of the family, after all they grew up together in this small
town and dated since the 7th grade and were married for 13 years. She died
in his arms at 33 years years of age due to cancer in this home. So many
ugly things were said about me, and no one even knew me. We had to move or
divorce it got so bad. We moved about 12 miles away and still have the
other home. It is to go to his girls when they are 18................read
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Gemma's Story
I met my second husband through my
best friend. He is her husband's brother, a few months after I split from
my ex-husband. We have had problems from both sides, mine and his. I have
two daughters, one is eleven the other ten years old, who live with us. My
husband also has two daughters, one is fifteen, the other is nine, who
live with their mother. Only recently my husband has had access to his
youngest daughter after not seeing her for five months and having to fight
in court, costing us a substantial amount of money in the process.
I hoped things would work out, but because his girls have never had any
discipline...............read
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Brooke's Story
I am so glad I found all of you! I
thought I was alone with this Ex- Drama thing going on. What is up with
these women? They don't want the man, yet they don't want anyone else to
have them.
I am 46 years old and living with my 30 year old Fiancé. He has an ex from
Hell. She must be bi-polar or something ! wow !
Now she birthed 3 children, only one of which is my fiancé's child but he
raised, supported and loved all three like they are his own. She had the
other two children during their relationship. She cheated on him. Lord
forgive her................read
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