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I met my now husband at
work, he had just split with his wife and asked me out. He has a
suspicions his ex had been seeing someone else and he could take no more
(he was right, his best friend) although she still denies seeing him until
after the split. I knew he had two children, which was ok.
As soon as our relationship
started, so did the abuse. Mainly text messages, really abusive, so much a
solicitor had to get them stopped, although not for long. My husband had a
vasectomy when they were together, so she loved the fact I couldn't have
children and used that at every opportunity. She married again and as soon
as they were hitched she made the children call her new husband dad!
(apparently the children asked if they could).
She uses the children all
the time to get at my husband, saying they prefer their new dad etc, she
even double barrelled their names without asking us. He has never missed
one maintenance payment which was done through a court order and so can't
be altered. Every few months she tries to up the amount, we did increase
it once but this still wasn't good enough.
She now has a new baby
(which by the way is her new husbands 6th natural child with three wives)
and is now insisting on more money again. They have recently moved house,
to a bigger property but continues to plead poverty. She thinks my husband
should do more hours and overtime, although he currently works approx 65
hours a week.
We are also taking the
children away for 2 weeks this year, which we have done every year since
the split, she has taken them away once in 4 years. Most of the time we
just try to ignore her, which winds her up even more, but sometimes I just
want to aaaaargh!!!! We can't see an end to this until the children are
old enough to make their own minds up, but this could be a while, she has
them securely tied to her, making sure every thing Daddy (you know, the
one that walked out on us) does is wrong.
I feel very tied, as my
husband won't let me argue back with her. I know that's what she wants but
sometimes it just pays to fight back, and makes me feel a whole lot
better.